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May 26, 2011
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how much better that would have been; i love wolves, and they love their young. but i was raised by a lunatic narcissistic psychopath and a frigid sociopath. which leads to many interesting quandaries, the current one being my neighbor, Pamela Pearl. these types of people are not common, so most cannot recognize them. she is one. and she has everyone fooled. most realize her control issues are excessive, but they leave it at that, and chalk it up to us all having our faults. but i see her, and she does cause harm, and i have injuries to resent.

two of the things i wish to reveal are quite telling, but i must temper my wish to expose her with my concern for her daughters, because it will be plain to her where the information came from (and she will punish them, and i know what this type of person can do). somehow in spite of her, her daughters are lovely people. she forced them to vote for Hillary in the primaries. forced. went into the voting booth with them, and if they did not accede to her wishes, there were to be consequences, i believe involving their monies for college. they both wished to vote for Obama. there was an intractable rule that the one thing they were never to do was bring home a black boy. it was plainly and unmistakably said.

this mindset no doubt played a large part in one of the injuries i have to resent. when my son was 13, after they had lived here for two years, she forbid them from playing together anymore over a trifling incident. there was no one else my son's age in the neighborhood. he was isolated for the next 7 years, and we are thankfully moving now. the other is that she prevents our dogs from playing together. i cannot fathom her motivation in this. the dogs love each other. and each is not prone to particularly like other dogs. they have always loved each other, and the joy they feel when they have managed to play together would warm anyone's heart, and i, who love my dog, have to see him suffer when he sees her and is not permitted to play with her. and he does suffer, and i have no way to explain why to him. the dog loves her, but she does not deserve such a lovely dog. Hitler's dog would have loved him. i'm not calling her Hitler, but certainly Goebbels would not be such a stretch.

my dog has been having mild seizures, and we don't know why. i take him for walks which seems to help. this past sunday he had one, and i was walking him, and it seemed to be taking longer to settle, and i felt his heart beating very fast when i checked on him. out of desperation i went to Pamela's house, she is a nurse, and i thought perhaps she might look at him and be able to tell something (i avoid the emergency vet if i can) or at least let the dogs play together in such a case, i thought it would help drake. i knew the chances were slim, i did, but in my desperation and my love for my dog i tried. she mumbled a lame excuse and closed the door on my face. i walked away, and then as my anger grew i walked back and tried to tell them what i thought of them (she and her girlfriend were mowing the lawn, the girlfriend i feel sorry for, she seems nice but is caught under Pamela's thumb) they did not stop their mowers and pretended i was not there. so if i did do anything in my anger, it pales in contrast to what harm she has done to me. i would pay 50 times the worth of the item in question to undo the damage done to my son and my dog, and more if i were rich and had access to more. and then there is just the general principal of the horrific person she is, while pretending otherwise and having everyone fooled.
i am undecided yet whether to try to disseminate this around my neighborhood, only out of concern for the daughter. i have her email, i am considering emailing it to her and asking her about it, and perhaps holding off until a later time.
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